Jun 29
Caroline Cartwright & Hubby - Still Gross

Caroline Cartwright & Hubby - Still Gross

Ah, this wildebeest and her husband are once again back in the news.  I love that the mainstream stories never mention how hideous she is.  Apparently she is now facing 12 weeks in jail because she can’t shut her her mouth while her other holes get plugged after repeated court orders.

CBSNews.com writes:

NEWCASTLE, England (CBS) Caroline Cartwright, of northeast England, has loud sex. Really, really loud sex.

So loud, in fact, that she has been jailed for it and forced to live in separate housing from her loud lovemaking partner in crime, husband Steve. She has been the subject of multiple noise abatement orders since 2005 and has broken all of them, according to the Daily Mail.

Now the Newcastle Crown Court has told her that she has one more chance to button up or spend 12 weeks in prison.

The sex has been described as “murder” and “unnatural” and is so loud that it drowns out her neighbors’ televisions. The complaints began about two years earlier when multiple complaints from neighbors, a postman and even a mother walking her child to school, prompted police to issue a “noise abatement order.”

She went on to violate the order at least five times and was issued an even stronger “anti-social behavior order,” which she proceeded to break three more times before she recived an eight week prison sentence, suspended for 12 months, in January.

Please visit CBSNews.com to read the rest of the story.

Popularity: 11%

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Dec 09
Theodore Sypnier

Theodore Sypnier

Wow, this story blew my fragile mind when I read it.   This 100 year old freak named Theodore Sypnier is about to get released from a halfway house back into society and pretty much everyone, including himself, has acknowledged that he will re-offend.  People are fa-reak-ing out.

The article from SkyNews speaks for itself:

Theodore Sypnier was freed from jail in upstate New York and is being moved from a half-way house to a flat in Buffalo.

Residents say the sex offender should spend the rest of his life behind bars, and fear he will prey on youngsters in the area.

“I want him away from society as long as possible,” Erie County district attorney Frank Sedita told wgrz.com.

“It doesn’t matter to me that he’s 100-years-old. He’s evil. He’s a paedophile. Paedophiles are the worst.”

Sypnier was charged in 1999 with raping two young sisters, who were aged four and seven at the time.

The minister in charge of the half-way house said Sypnier has remained completely unrepentant of his crimes in counselling sessions.

Reverend Terry King said the elderly paedophile can still walk for miles and should be kept away from children.

He added: “He has been adamant that, ‘I’m 100, and I’m not gonna change’.”

Popularity: 65%

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Dec 09

Does Tiger Woods Want To Be A Cuckold?

By Freaky Sex News on December 9th, 2009 at 10:04 am in Cuckoldry No Comments »
Watch out Tiger, being a cuckold isn't all it's cracked up to be! Photo courtesy of scumbag pornographers Grip & Cram Johnson from Chatsworth Pictures, from "Cuckold 5"

Watch out Tiger, being a cuckold isn't all it's cracked up to be! Photo courtesy of scumbag pornographers Grip & Cram Johnson of Chatsworth Pictures, from "Cuckold 5"

Wow, I know yesterday I said I was going to steer clear of Tiger Woods stories, but this one kinda hit me like an A-Bomb.  Tiger apparently told one of the slut bags that he loved to jizz into that he wanted to watch her get banged by other celebs.

The Huffington Post reports (based on an Us Weekly story):

US magazine has reprinted an erotic cuckold dream that Tiger Woods reportedly sent to one of his alleged mistresses. Woods told “Rachel” in an email that he envisioned her having sex with Derek Jeter and Bones star David Boreanaz — at the same time. The juicy email describes his fantasy in lurid detail.

Tiger Woods’ e-mail reads:

“I had a dream we were married and I was leading the tournament,” Woods reportedly wrote. “I came home, excited to see you, and there you were in the bedroom getting f–ked by Derek and David [Boreanaz]. Some part of me thinks you would like that.”

I get the feeling Tiger would like that too, he’d probably grab some popcorn and watch the show.  I also wonder if Tiger wanted to watch his wife bang other guys and she wasn’t into it.  That could drive anyone to adultery!

Popularity: 76%

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Dec 08
Dear Tiger, a fame whore is still a whore. - FSN

Dear Tiger, a fame whore is still a whore. - FSN

So far, we have avoided getting into the whole Tiger Woods infidelity scandal because, frankly, there hasn’t really been much “Freaky” about it.  I mean, if I was rich and famous I’d be lining up sluts from here to eternity to bang.  That’s just me.

But, at this point, it seems like Tiger has been rolling around from one low rent vag to the next.  So, I saw this CBS News article this morning and found it fitting for the site.

They write:

(CBS) A report on the Daily Beast Web site Monday said superstar golfer Tiger Woods might have a problem with prescription medications, but more talk came Tuesday that Woods may really be addicted to sex.

Woods is just the latest celebrity embroiled in allegations of infidelity.

When does cheating constitute a sex addiction?

The number of women claiming to have had a sexual relationship with Woods has reportedly grown to ten.

Dr. Drew Pinksy, of the VH1 series “Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew,” told CBS News, “You’ve got to wonder about addiction. That’s the process that has people doing things that don’t make sense.”

And that’s raised the question — when does infidelity cross over into sex addiction?

Pinksy speculated that Woods’ behavior could be part of a larger problem.

He said, “I wouldn’t be surprised if we find out there is a chemical addiction, as well. Sometimes, these sexual compulsions come out as part of an overall addictive process to a chemical.”

Check out their site for the rest of the article. Unless there turns out to be a Tiger Woods sex tape, or we learn he has a Tranny addiction, I doubt we will post much more about this story.  But, you never know!

Popularity: 40%

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Nov 23

Well, looks like being a national hero definitely can help your sex life.

amNewYork writes:

Capt. Chesley Sullenberger, the quick-thinking pilot who became an international hero after he saved the lives of 155 passengers when he safely ditched his plane in the Hudson River last January, has reaped an unexpected benefit: “Rock star sex.”

That’s how Sullenberger, who was interviewed Monday by Matt Lauer for NBC’s “People of the Year” TV show described his new found mojo with his wife, Laurie.

“I had joked the other day that . . . the hero sex really helps a 20-year-old marriage,” Laurie Sullenberger said in the interview set to air Thursday.

“Rock star sex,” chimed in the 58-year-old Capt. Sullenberger.

A boost in the bedroom is a natural reward for a man who displays the kind of courage and confidence Sully showed in the cockpit of his US Airways jet, sex therapists said.

“He became an alpha man to the public and that triggered in her, almost instinctually, the desire to mate with the alpha male,” said Dorothy Hayden, a Manhattan sex therapist. “He gets stronger, his personality gets stronger, his sense of self improves and that’s very sexy.”

Man, being a hero must certainly be an aphrodisiac, because one look at that video will tell you this guy is about as exciting as a colonoscopy.  Ya know, I must admit I’m kinda happy that Captain Sully is getting his balls drained on a regular basis.  Does that make me gay?

Popularity: 52%

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Nov 11
AHHHH! I'd scream, too. Yikes.

AHHHH! I'd scream, too. Yikes.

Man, this story is just ridiculous.  This British couple was making such a constant, annoying screaming and howling ruckus while they were supposedly having sex that it got blown up into a big court case.  And now, they’ve lost their appeal and will be forced to stop being such attention seeking morons going forward.

I think we’ve all probably had noisy neighbors before, and maybe even neighbors you could hear having sex.  But it sounds like these fools took it to ridiculous levels.

The Chronicle (Australia) writes:

A BRITISH woman lost her appeal on Tuesday against a ban on her noisy sex sessions, after a court heard how her marathon romps that kept neighbours awake sounded like someone being murdered.

Caroline and Steve Cartwright’s “howling” lovemaking sounded “unnatural”, “hysterical” and “like they are both in considerable pain”, Newcastle Crown Court in northeast England heard.

A 10-minute recording of their sex sessions was played out in court, which also heard how she tried covering her face with a pillow to muffle her cries of passion.

Neighbours at their home in Washington, County Durham, south of Newcastle, complained about the noise – as did passers-by and the postman.

The couple were banned from “shouting, screaming or vocalisation at such a level as to be a statutory nuisance”, but Caroline Cartwright, 48, appealed under human rights laws against her conviction for breaching the ban.

However, a judge on Tuesday upheld the original conviction and ordered that the banning order should stay.

Caroline Cartwright said she was unable to stop the din.

“I tried to control it. I even tried to use a pillow (over her own face) to try and lessen the noise,” she said.

What can I say? People are idiots.

Popularity: 63%

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Nov 11

The geniuses over at Us Magazine have put out a story chocked full of psychological experts to tell us something that we all already know. Celebrities are narcissistic!

Us Magazine writes:

Jennifer Lopez and ousted Miss California USA Carrie Prejean are the latest stars to find themselves caught in a sex tape scandal.

Given the bad luck of Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian and many others, why do celebs still make sex tapes in the first place?

“You like the spotlight. You may have some narcissistic tendencies, and you’re more likely to have an exhibitionist side,” Dr. Jenn Berman, a sex expert and licensed therapist, tells Usmagazine.com.

In an interview on the Today show Tuesday, Prejean said she appeared solo in her tape (filmed when she was a teen) and that it was meant for an ex-boyfriend who was away. Meanwhile, Lopez’s first husband, Ojani Noa, claims he owns 11 hours of home video footage involving sexual situations from their marriage (a California judge has granted a temporary restraining order barring its release).

Psychotherapist Rhonda Findling, author of Don’t Call That Man!, tells Us celebs are being “unrealistic” if they think footage will never surface.

Celebrities narcissistic and self destructive?  Thanks for the 4-1-1!  What I find most interesting about the Prejean sex tape is that it’s a solo masturbation tape.  In the world of porn doing solo sex tapes is like dipping your toe into the water to see how it feels.  Porn star training wheels, if you will.  I’d be very surprised if one day her 10 man interracial gang bang tape doesn’t show up on RedTube!

And I pray to little baby Jesus that it does.

Popularity: 39%

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Nov 10

I caught wind of an interesting story today about a paid informant in a Pennsylvania prostitution case.  You see, this guy complained to the cops that a woman in a massage parlor offered to jack him off.  We’re not sure if he was more offended about the offer for sexual favors or his lack of the means to afford them.

So this guy complains to the cops, who offer to wire him up and give him money to pay for various sex acts the girls at the massage parlor.  The court ended up ruling that the police acted outrageously, so the whore got off the hook and the informant got a few free handjobs and possibly other sex acts.

Law.com writes:

In a case of first impression, the Pennsylvania Superior Court ruled last week that state troopers committed “outrageous government conduct” when investigating alleged prostitution at a massage parlor in the Lehigh Valley by giving money to an undercover informant to have sex four times with two different women at the parlor.

The police investigation started when a patron of the massage parlor complained to state police that he had been offered “‘manual sexual stimulation’” after being given a massage. The patron did not accept the offer because he could not afford it, the opinion said.

The patron then agreed to become an informant for the police, the opinion said. He wore a wire and was provided money with which he purchased sexual acts with two different women at the massage parlor on four occasions, the opinion said.

“‘The decision to send the citizen into Shiatsu Spa on four occasions for a smorgasbord of sexual activity violates principles of fundamental fairness,’” Steinberg (the original trial judge) wrote. “‘… We expect more from the police, and demand that they conduct their investigations and utilize their resources without resorting to such embarrassing investigative techniques … No standards existed for this type of investigation, and some of the behavior by the participants was sophomoric.’”

It’s a pretty detailed article so follow the link below to read the whole thing.  I hope one day to have a hooker habit funded by my local police department.

Popularity: 38%

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Nov 10

It always surprises me when people sue someone for giving them herpes.  To me, herpes is the expected price tag for living a degenerative lifestyle.  Get a good health insurance plan, a prescription for Valtrex, and live with it!

That being said, this particular case is a little different.  A sad, bitter, and undoubtedly micro-penised cuckold husband is suing his wife’s psychiatrist who alegedly get both her – and transitively him – the herp!

AboveTheLaw.com writes:

Poor Carl Levine. His wife has allegedly been having an affair with her psychiatrist since about 2000. And the psychiatrist allegedly had herpes. And allegedly gave Levine’s wife herpes. And now Levine has herpes.

We’ve heard of some off-the-wall psychiatric treatments but this one sounds quite unhealthy.

Now Levine is suing Dr. Robert Werboff for hiding his disease, for knowingly infecting Levine’s wife, for thus knowingly exposing Levine to herpes, and for just being a really bad doctor. According to Levine’s complaint [PDF], he has suffered “severe and permanent physical, emotional and mental distress” and “anguish, humiliation, embarrassment, fright, shock, pain, discomfort, and anxiety and has suffered permanent injuries and damages.”

Check out the article for some interesting information.  Apparently cuckolds getting herpes is a more common occurrence than you might realize!  This ruins my weekend plans!

Popularity: 100%

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Nov 05

Wow, a South Carolina man who has already been sent to jail once for having sex with this same horse has been caught at it again, and has now received a stiff 3 year jail term.  Something about that sweet, aromatic horse vagina must have made him throw all caution to the wind and come back for more.  Will he be able to stay away from her when he gets out of jail?  I don’t think you can put a restraining order on love.

USA Today writes:

Back in July we reported a horse-and-buggery story involving a South Carolina man caught on video having sex with a mare named Sugar and then held at gunpoint by her owner when he returned for another stable tryst.

Today, Rodell Vereen, 50, was sentenced to three years in prison for pleading guilty to buggery with 21-year-old Sugar for the second time in two years. He was also ordered to stay away from the horse’s stable and to get mental help when he’s paroled.

And now the question on everyone’s mind, “Does Rodell Vereen have a gigantic horsecock?”  One of his cellmates will have to write in and let us know.

Popularity: 57%

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